Monday, October 6, 2008
Up, up and away
A few weeks ago I had the most wonderful meeting with a wonderful buch of people. But oh, the dread before I went! Sleepless nights, Leo telling me that I mutter about glass in the little sleep that I do get, and me getting up tired and drained in the morning.
Thoughts of 'What if they laugh and chase me out of the building.' roamed through my head. Them telling that I am just not good enough for them to represent me, etc. 'I am a doomed failure' raced through my head every day leading up to 'the big' day.
Then I arrived - too early it seemed, and was asked to wait, as they were still busy with someone else. I wanted to make a dash for the door, but is was locked and the secretary had to open it. No sculking away like an invisible intruder. I just did not have the guts to ask her to open the door ...
What felt like hours later, I was invited into the boardroom. There the panel sat, all looking at me. I dress plainly. I do not wear make-up. But I do wear some of my work. After I unpacked everything, the grilling started. Who am I. What do I expect to get out of my work. Were do I plan to go with it. On and on it went. But they also ooh'ed and ah'ed over my work. One girl was just rolling a set of beads between her fingers, playing with it. Ideas rolled between us, me telling that it was possible or not, seeds were being planted. Now it is my job to nuture it, and bring it to life.
The next morning I got a phonecall. Those beads, and that ring, you remember? Yes, I remembered. Could I make a bracelet out of them, and could she buy the ring? And by the way, it was such a pleasure to meet someome of your calibre work that we can represent ...
I am gobsmacked. What? You must be joking! I make plain and basic beads. Nothing fancy about them. But someone LOVED them. And that is it. Plein en simpel. Accept it and go with your insticts. Something that I find very difficult after years of mental downgrading from those close to me.
So now I have a wonderful bunch of people who cares about what I make, and is prepared to showcase it for me!